The Thinking 


September 19, 2017

STEPHEN IPPOLITO writes from Australia:

I well recall the day I first happened upon the intellectual and spiritual oasis that is The Thinking Housewife blog. Like a great book, I just couldn’t put it down and that is how I ended up reading all the way back to May 2009 where it all started.

I sometimes wonder if you ever revisit those early entries and, if so, what you make of the blog’s evolution. The blog seems to me every bit as good today, even better, but definitely a different look and “feel” from those early days.

It being just after the inauguration of President Obama, you blogged on his lawyer wife in that first month in a short riff on first ladies. You concluded with the rhetorical but interesting question: “How long before we have a first Lady who leaves the White House with a brief case every day?”

Thanks to the beauteous Melania, your country has escaped that fate so far.

But even as Melania, who goes about her public duties as First Lady with supremely feminine grace and dignity that reflects tremendously well on the U.S., she attracts ceaseless petty criticism from nasty so-called pundits, including but not limited to the loathsome Ms Yaeger, whom you featured recently, and whose unedited bio has been unearthed and can be viewed here.

I have my own view as to why the current First Lady is so loathed by the liberal “opinion leaders” of the day. In my view it’s not just the classically pretty face, the trim figure attesting to self-discipline and self-respect, her height, her wealth, her leisure and her title as “Mrs Trump”- although would anyone deny that all of these things feed the hate?

Do you think it might be the lady’s devotion to her son’s welfare above all and her embrace of the traditional role of supporter to her husband that really earns her the hatred that comes her way? I do.

Melania appears to me to unashamedly embrace the twin roles of protective, nurturing mother to her son and supportive wife. Am I alone in thinking that like most truly self-confident and happy people Melania does not need or desperately seek the limelight for herself ?

How different this lady seems from some of the pushy, graceless and self-important “co-consuls” that have occupied the role in recent times.

To my mind your most important and worthiest First Lady was Abigail Adams, (a lady who was every inch her formidable husband’s intellectual and moral equal), and who had the reserves of energy and strength to raise her children largely alone and to keep the family farm alive without her husband during his long services in the continental congress. It was Abigail who famously admonished her husband, who valued her advice above all others, to always “remember the ladies” during congressional deliberations.

I also especially admire such overlooked quiet achievers as Mamie Eisenhower and Bess Truman. They were women of great character whose husbands, it seems to me, simply would not have achieved their office without them. But such ladies were strong in a quiet way and exerted their influence behind the scenes and so are reviled as weak by today’s shrill, feminist harpies who lack the strength of character and self-assurance to exhibit such or any humility at all.

As I ponder on the difference between Melania and her critics I am reminded of Margaret Thatcher’s great assessment, late in her life, on the motivations of most people now: “It used to be about trying to do something. Now it’s about trying to be someone”.

Laura, I know that you held no high hopes for Melania before the election. Is it too early to ask if you have formed a view on her yet?

Enquiring minds want to know.

Laura writes:

Thank you for the very generous compliments.

I’ll make my comments short. This smashed wrist is a pain.

You are right, Melania Trump does not cower before the aggressive assaults against her. She doesn’t apologize about her lack of career ambition. She has a general reserve, preferring to stay in the background. She does almost no feminist sloganeering and is confident in her femininity. All of that is refreshing (though truthfully I don’t spend much time following her activities.) She never attended an American college or university, vehicles for radicalizing women and ruining them. She did come from a Communist country, but she seems to have escaped being miseducated as a feminist there too. She apparently does not talk much at all about women being supreme, global victims.

How different this lady seems from some of the pushy, graceless and self-important “co-consuls” that have occupied the role in recent times.

Yes, I agree with you and appreciate your observations about strong, but quiet First Ladies.

Still Melania has made some feminist statements, praising U.N. efforts to spread feminism around the world, and she has followed her pushy predecessors by starting a campaign to get the government involved in something it has no business with — cyber-bullying by children.

Sometimes Melania dresses tastefully and elegantly (see her with the ridiculous French First Mom Brigitte Macron below), but other times, her clothes are tight and revealing (see two photos below). She is a beautiful woman, but the First Lady role should not be an occasion for arousing sexual interest.

More importantly, on the negative side, her union with Trump is adulterous. Obviously she is a product of the culture around her and that doesn’t mean she is a horrible person. But no matter how strong her maternal protectiveness and grace, she is offering a poor example in marriage and living in mortal sin. It’s nice that Trump did not have to behead any wives to get his succession of women, but he still broke his vows and thus is not married to Melania in God’s eyes. She’s more First Mistress than First Lady.

But how much worse it would have been to have a First Mister or another First Commissar.


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